YUFFIE'S BACK!

Apparently, I've been gone, but I've been here before--not that I even remember it, but the whole 'Yuffie, you're back' I've gotten from Vinnie and Tifs, kinda gave it away. See? I have a brain, too, contrary to popular belief. Yuffie can be smart when she wants to! (She just doesn't want to, very often.) So, apparently this computer belonged to the Yuffie that was here before, but it's all empty, save for the desktop, which has a pic of Materia and a scribbled 'it's all mine, suckers' on it...which is in my writting, so that proves that I really was here before! I wonder if I was as psyched about how creepy this City is before, or not. I mean, really, guys. It's like a meeting of evil villains and the good guys, all in one tiny space. I'm gonna wait for the big bang to happen. Creepy place.

Anyway, I need to 'settle in', as Vinnie put it, and I NEED TO FIND A JOB! Apparently, just robbing people of their monies will get me in jail, and PLUS, I don't do the stealing thing anymore--unless it's to steal someone's breakfast, if Tifa ever makes pancakes. Yum...Focus! Right, so I've tried to offer my services for bodyguarding and stuff to the nice citizens around, but apparently grocery stores owners aren't in danger of dying, so they don't need me. I'm unemployed. I'm unemployed?!

But I still work for bossman, right? Reeve? Can I still work for you? Not that WRO has anything to do in here, but it'd give me a better feeling in my mind if I know I've a job. If anyone asks, then, I would hand them my 'WRO forced volunteer employee' card. And...uhm...you won't mind if I come live with you again, would you? I know the ticking is killing me...

............where the hell am I? This doesn't look like a hospital...

[ooc; Here. Have a Yuffie back. *temporarily losing her muse* Reseted, remembers nothing. Fun times.]

[Standing in front of a gate.]

Maybe it will lead me to somewhere tranquil, where I can rethink some things. You guys...Reeve, Vincent, Tifa...I'm sorry. I'm sorry I've wronged you. I'll be going, for a while, to set things straight in my head. So...you don't need to worry about keeping childish Yuffie at bay anymore, yeah?

General...the person who'll come back...you might not like her. So, please...forgive me.

This City's been a dream land, and most of the time, not in a good way. I've had fun, though. Hopefully, I'll be back. Been nice, people.

See you.

[ooc; Cue her fading away in a flash of white. PLOTSTATSANDSHIT: Well, since mun will be going on a two/three weeks hiatus, Yuffie's being pulled out into her own world. She found an exit, surprisingly. Anyway, off to her time in the hospital she goes! (if any of you remember, when Yuffie arrived here, she was bloody and recently maimed by a dragon? in her world, I've taken a tiny liberty of having her in a coma. SO! She's in a freakin' coma. For two/three weeks. Yeah, that'll be fun. Anyway, see you folks laterz!]

Healed, miraculously! No more hives for me, at last. Anyway, what's with all the silly masks, people? I didn't know we were holding Halloween already.

[Private to Sephiroth]

Is she gone yet?

Okay. OKAY. This was not what I'd signed up for when I told the old man I wanted to be a ninja--not that it would've done me any good, not telling him, anyway. Family duty is family duty, he said. Anyway.

So there I was, valiantly going around, exploring the forests and the deserts and the fauna and flora, like the good little Girl Scout I am--before you ask, Sephiroth, I've no idea what those girls are, but it sounds cool, since they scout, okay? Ninjas do a lot of scouting. And don't give me those dots! I know you wanna use the dots, and you seriously need to not talk to Vinnie a lot, because his dots are contagious, I swear! Anyway. Back to point. So there I was, courageously scouting the areas here, when I was viciously attacked by an invisible stranger than I couldn't have fought, for I couldn't see them, and I was too busy FALLING FROM THE TREES...and then I landed in this bush. After taking my reasonable, well-justified vengeance against the--ohmigod, Yuffie knows what 'vengeance' meaaaans, everybody ruuuun~--fuckin' bush, I strutted home, for cookies. And milkshakes.

And now, WOE! I'm horribly, terribly, sadly condemned to spending a few days in bed, for the boils on my skin--which are grossness, by the way--will take a while to fade. But! Should I, the Great Warrior Ninja Yuffie The Awesome Kisaragi, fall heroically to a case of plant lepper, I hereon declare that:

My cats are to be left to Alec, even if he's not from our world, I'm sure the cat'll go to him anyway, especially Pepper, the scuzz. Not Saphron, though, I'm leaving her in Vincent's hands, to hold and to cherish and to cuddle forever and ever, since it will be this adorable, awesome little cat--that kinda looks like me--whom I leave responsible of torturing cheering him up.
I leave my pot and pans to bossman, even though they're his, anyway, since he never lets me use the kitchen. I also leave him the famous Kisaragi recipe for Best Fucking Jasmine Tea EVER. Don't you dare pass it on further, or my boils-covered ghost will haunt you, Reeve.
I leave my clothes, and my love, to Aerith, who'll shine forever. Even when she's mad.
Tseng, {to you I leave Aerith.]

And to Sephiroth, I leave the beautiful honour of scratching my skin from the itches until I eventually go mad--if I haven't yet--and die from it all.

[ooc; This is why Cella shouldn't be left to boredom. Monsters come out. Melodramatic!Yuffie strikes for the first time! I retell the story for your sakes: she slipped on a branch, fell in a bush of something she was allergic to, and now has a rash. But obviously, everything has to sound special. Italics to Tseng are in Wutainese, and Sephiroth's strike is filtered to him only. :3 I enjoyed writing this way too much.]

One word, City. One word. Grossness.

I feel sorry for that thing's mother.

[ooc; So, here's to staying inside for two days unless I decide otherwise. Inside? Two days? Yuffie? Yeah, that don't spell right. ;D]

Phew. Lights are back on, no more music, and who the hell was pulling out fireworks with human bits yesterday? Fun times.

ROLECALL!

Aerith: WHERE ARE YOU??? Tell that forest to bring you back NOW!
Sephiroth: You. Better not be brooding or I'll smash your head into a wall, or something. Nyah.
AVALANCHE: Why are we so quiet? Let's go find something to smash. Villains to neuter! Even evil kittens sounds good by now. I'm bored. And that is dangerous.

Why are all the lights out? I only have this shiny bracelette to serve as a guiding light--ohhh, shiny!--but it's not enough and I can't see anything. Much. It's been a while since I've been through this sort of thing. I gotta remember what Checkov trained me...

Is anyone near enough? Reeve? Mangy robocat? Anyone?

What's with the music?

[ooc; In which the fail!mun returns from the unnanounced hiatus to resume things and shove her into a curse. SUMMARIZING, I had to leave and go get my college applications in, and ended up missing for four days. SORRY! Back now! So we'll pretend Yuffie was around, like she usually is.]

[voice post]

OKAY, YUFFIE, WHO DO WE ROB NOW, HUH, HUH, HUHUHUHUUUUUH? COME ON, COME ON, I WANNA PLAY, LET'S PLAY, LET'S GO AND BE NINJA AND ROB PEOPLE AND--MRMMPH

First off, if we're ninjas, WE'RE DISCREET AND SUBTLE. Secondly, we're not robbing anything. I have quit those days of crime. Thirdly, what the hell are you?

Okaaaaaaay, we won't be noisy anymore, we promise, promise, promise! We're Arandion, your daemon. We're your physical soul.

That makes no sense.

We never understood it much either. WANNA PLAY, YUFFIE, WANNA PLAY? COME ON!

Explanation, please. Lyra...didn't you have one of these daemon thingies?


[ooc: A white ermine, checked with the test thingy and all. Very cheerful, and obviously suffering ADD. Oh and, split personality, whut whut! XD]

[Private; unhackable]

Well, yesterday was. Huh. No words. Reccount.

1. Stupid confession.
2. Heartbreak.
3. Letting-go resolutions.
4. Sephiroth and the stupid Fountain.
5. Preventing the end of the world by means of Awesome Head Massages, copyrighted Yuffie Kisaragi.
6. .....meep.

[Filtered to Avalanche//Turks]

Well now he knows. And he's not a happy camper. I mean, who would be happy, if they found out they're just this...lab experiment? I suggest you people take care of ShinRa well these days. And thank Leviathan that Hojo's not here. Not that he'd be here for long, anyway. Stupid asshole jerkface.

Vincent, you have to explain to him what Jenova is. I couldn't because I didn't know that well. And I didn't want to screw it up. And. Uhm. Yeah, sorry I left so suddenly from the Fountain, but I thought I'd have to get him calmed down somehow.

[/Filter]

Where...where is Aerith? Where did she go?? HAS ANYONE SEEN HER?

[Private; unhackable]

What have I done? What have I done? What have I done??

Oh, Leviathan, this wasn't supposed to go this way, and now he hates me, and will avoid me more, and I'll just--GAWD, YUFFIE, why's your stupid, stupid mouth so BIG? Couldn't you have kept it shut??

And what does he mean 'like I suspected'? He knew? He knew I was in love with him, and he just...HOW CAN HE BE SO---ARRRRRGHHHHH!!!

Calming down. Calming. Down. It's not the end of the world, Yuffie. The man you've been in love with for a long time now just made you so mad you ended up telling him about it, and now he's not replying back. It's fine. You just lost an awesome friend to awkwardness. I hate love. Hate it.

And this is what heartbreak feels like, I guess.

Fucking heart.

[[Speaks for itself. Yes, finally happened! Mood is actually visible.]]

( Private; Unhackable )

[Private to Aerith]

Can you...can someone...love a person, but...kiss another one? And...uhh...I...nevermind.

[Private to Dark]

Fine, fine. Where are we supposedly meeting?

[Private to Sephiroth]

Not to be a--but--what--what does--uhhh. What does it mean?

[[ooc; D'aww. Poor Yuffie's heart. Going through the initiation of letting-go-of-unrequited-love-interest at the moment. This might be painful. She might need cookies.]]

OH MY GAWD, WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I BEEN DOING YESTERDAY?

Masamune?! Masamune?! What hell, curse person, couldn't you have picked someone else? Emphasis on SOMEONE??? As in, A PERSON???

Jeez. Let's see how I do this.

Dark, I hope you didn't jump off a rooftop because of me.
Sephiroth, YOU KEEP YOUR LONG-ASS, SHINY SWORD AWAY FROM ME, YOU HEAR? ¬_¬ And I'm sorry I tried to force ribbons on it. Or that I clung to your hips. Nice hips, by the way. Or that...much of anything yesterday happened. LET'S FORGET ABOUT IT, OKAY?

Now Yuffie's going to go to her room, and wallow there in self-pity. Have fun, the rest of you~!

[ooc; Strikes are half-legible. And. Here comes the aftermath!]

I woke up this morning with butterflies in my stomach, and I couldn't stop thinking of my darling. So I've decided, in true Wutaian fashion, to compose a haiku of LOVE for it.

It goes like this:

You're cold as winter
I'd like to warm your silver
Heart of steel.


[ooc; SO AFFECTED. Today, Yuffie will be in love with Masamune, Sephiroth's seven feet long sword. From love poems, to clinging to his hip, to offering the sword ribbons, to many more. A Yuffie in love is dangerous enough--ask Vincent, not that he knows--but a Yuffie in love, and ANNOUNCING IT TO THE WORLD, is worse.]

[Filtered to AVALANCHE and Reeve and Tseng]

I think we should stop keeping Sephiroth in the shadows. If one of us tells him, it might be better than if he gets pissed off for us being silent, and looking it up himself. No-one wants another Meteor, right? And what better way to learn, than from your mistakes? I don't know...he's...different this time. Saner, and more controlled. Probably from way, way before he snapped on everyone. So. Someone should tell him.

[/filter]

[Private to Sephiroth]

The next time we spar, I'm getting you a shorter sword. Honestly.

[/Private]

What is with people in this City? I'm not your bird, idiots! Do I LOOK like a Chocobo?

This is all Aerith's fault. If anyone dares make a comment of 'gonna kill you for doing this' I will shove my Conformer up your asses. So shut up, it's not like I enjoy revealing secrets of mine. Besides, Aerith promises not to tag anyone else if I do this except maybe Cloud, but that's fine, so I am actually your hero. Here goes.

1. I don't as much hate my dad as resent him for making me steal for Wutai.
2. I love my country very much, which is why I stole for it to be richer. It pains me to stay away from it, but if that old man keeps on with the 'you need to rule with iron fist' routine, I can make the effort to do it.
3. I don't like being called a Princess. The idea of ruling a country scares me.
4. I wish I could be more feminine, sometimes. Those days are the days I remember my mother.
5. I actually do own a kimono, and I can actually cook pretty well. How else would I have been living so far? (Leviathan knows Vinnie doesn't cook.)
6. I haven't been kissed. Goes pretty much the same for the rest of deeds.
7. I'm in no hurry to get kissed, so don't offer. If I say no, it means no.
8. I don't like it when other people try to matchmake me with certain other people. If it happens, it happens and if not, I'll just re-sew my heart. I'm idealistic about love.
[Private; unhackable]
9. I have the biggest, impossible-to-bear crush on Vincent, and I already know it's probably love. I also know it'll always be unrequited, which is why it will never stop hurting. But I've made him a promise of not letting him brood back into his coffin, and if I have to stand by his side and act like a big ninny to distract him, I'll keep on doing it.
[/Private]

Now everyone can be amazed at the secret life of Yuffie. See, Sephiroth? I have it even worse than you do. Heh. Everyone else, laugh at anything and die.

[[ooc; I APOLOGIZE! But Aerith's been insisting a lot, and Yuffie can't deny her older sister anything. Really. NADA. Also, took Tseng's example because I couldn't help it. Hope the mun doesn't mine.]]

Okay, people. I know I'm in a terribly good mood now, but it's not because of what you think it is, so stop it. You know who you are.

Vincent, a day has past, stop scouting the goddamn place so much. Can I see you already, or do I have to hunt you down?

Screw the post from before. More important things.

VINNIE!!!

[[Ceeeelebrate good times, come ON~!]]

About the other day's curse: that was weird. I'm sure most of you think I'm insane, and I won't be the one to tell you otherwise. Anyway, Lyra, it was nice, lunch! I hope I didn't...exasperate you. (look, Yuffie knows big words!)

Speaking of big words. I have a complaint to file in, and this goes to all people from my planet who know me, or think they know me, or dare act like they know me. I'm 19 years old, and perfectly able to take care of myself. Regardless of what the lot of you might love to chat about, I'm not the grown version of a 5 year old child, and while I sometimes do terrorize Rufus a bit, it's all in good humour and to help him relax. I'm not some...stupid...childish...kid that's a complete nightmare to have as a roommate. So I'd appreciate it if you stopped talking about me as if I were. Jerks.

[Private; unhackable]
Sheesh!!! I know most of them are, what, almost my age, and come from a time where I wasn't this old, and I was still a brat, but SWEET JENOVA, PEOPLE, could you give a girl the benefit of doubt? What, does my name come linked with childishness, materia stealing and loud mouths? I wish someone, anyone really, were here to prove them wrong. But I guess I've...sorta brought this upon myself. I shouldn't have teased Vinny about his redemtion so much. He was right, it's a hard thing to manage.

On a side note, I've met a Sephiroth that doesn't go stabby-stabby on our asses. What a change. I guess when he's saner, he's more...erk...nice to the eye? -_- Whatever! He's also aparently a virgin--I wonder if THAT'S another reason why he got so stabby-stabby on our asses...--, not that I care. Precisely. Another first impression I screw up.

Mrrph. Vacation time, yet?
[/private]

[[Someone's feeling down and emo~! Or maybe she's just a bit irritated. ^__^ Don't blame me, Yuffie's been screaming at me for one of these posts. There's another face to her perpetual annoying grin? Er? Something...? WHERE'S A VINNY TO REASSURE HER?? Though he'd probably just agree with the rest. XD Strikes are invisible.]]

To the person who gave me that awesome coat, thank you. Proves kinda handy, when the weather's this shitty, huh? Makes me sort of wonder if maybe you knew what was coming...¬_¬


Aside from gettin thrown in a paralel universe, I suppose things are fine. I might be boring myself way too much here. So, I have a few petitions.

Bossman: can't you cook up a mission? I'm all antsy to get some knuckle-action, and this city is starting to be...peaceful. I'm only nineteen! I'm not cut out to be peaceful!

[Private]
Dear City: please to give me a Vinny. I need someone to nag try to incessantly cheer up. Or else my days are incomplete. Kaythanksbye!
[/Private]

So, there seems to be some sort of piano concert near building 5. I rather like the sounds of it. Will be there for this afternoon.

Okay, City. First, we were friends. You were nice, there was no law to bind me down, everything was free...but now, we're not friends anymore. I'm dissing you, OH YEAH.

Because I'll NEVER forgive you for putting me in that...whatever the fuck that was, world or something...topless and in a skirt, and with a guy trying to grope me. So. I KILL YOUR GROPING GUYS, AND SPIT IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION, you bastard City.

I'm okay now. Yuffie has calmed down.

Greed. Forget all I said, AND done when I appeared, and just...erase that part from your brain.

Yuffie needs another t-shirt. And long pants. Pants, please.

Where has everyone else been?

[[She's back. And if Mike's okay with this, when she was dropped back, she landed near Greed. All...shirtless. Wheee...]]

Alright, who the hell managed to slip something in my drinks, why the hell am I wearing a mini skirt even Tifa wouldn't wear, and where the hell has my shirt gone? And bra for the matter.

And where the fuck am I?

...why am I surrounded by squealing ladies asking for a jacuzzi dip?!

[[Yuffie's been dropped into Playboy: The Mansion. So yes, she's one of the Playboy girls. Soon to be the murderess of Hugh Hefner, if he tries to slip in a grope. I don't know why I didn't send her in an adventure game...maybe because this idea amuses me more?]]

Hey, look Reeve, no hangover today!

Greed, thanks for the outing, twas fun and laughter. Like going back to my roots. I think I'm starting to get rusty.

Naruto, is there any chance you still want to spar? Friendly, duh. :D

Uhm. So what else is there to do in this city? I'm bored already...

Wait. P.S. Needed!


SECOND BOSSMAN HAS BEEN LOCATED--although strictly speaking, he wasn't so much our boss as the group cheerleader (y'know, with the 'let's mosey'), but anyway--AND IT IS NOW A FACT. THE CITY IS GONNA BE FULL WILL EMOKIDS SOONER OR LATER! 8D

AERIS IS HERE AND I WASN'T HAVING AN ILLUSION ABOUT IT IN MY DRUNK STATE, OH MY GAWD! AERIS IS HERE, HEE~~!!!

Reeve, I'm sorry I piched it, but you issued a challenge, so it was all your fault. If it's any consolation, I'll have you know it's nice and firm and very gropable. ;D

Tseng, since you seem to be housing my sister-figure at the moment, you wouldn't mind too much if casually dropped by for a chat and reminiscing, would you? Thanks!

[[Course by then, she's already at Tseng's apartment, so how could he say no? XD]]